The confusion in my life started in 1975 when my parents were divorced and ended when I was incarated. My parents' hatred for each other was the basis for my confusion. I decided to live with my dad. When I finally realized my dad would be no major factor in my maturity, I decided to educate myself. I educated myself in the ways of the world, the only way I knew to "succeed in the 80's and 90's".

At the time I was starting to grow up and venture on my own, my dad decided to become the disciplinarian in my life. He never was caring or loving. He just wanted to punish me and this method of "teaching" only brought more confusion.

In September, 1986 I decided to kill my dad. I figured if I couldn't please him, why did I need him? Even though I loved him, I couldn't handle the pain of being his son. As much as I wanted to be loved, I didn't know what love was. It was kind of ironic, seeking after something so desperately and not knowing what I was looking for. On September 26, 1986, I shot and killed my dad. On September 29, 1986, I was arrested for the murder. October 1, 1986, I was taken to bond court where they read the charges and set bail at one million dollars. Finally, it set in, I was going to prison for a long time. I felt completely lost, not being able to control my future.

On October 15, 1986, I accepted Christ into my life. After two weeks of Bible reading and Christian love from other people in Jesus, I was able to see the love and peace Christ freely offers. God locked me up so I had time to see Christ and His love.

June, 1988, I was sentenced to thirty years. Then I was sent to Joliet Correctional Center.

After many changes in my life, I am maturing in Christ. Knowing that His love is forever and unconditional gives me strength to live the best I can. Today, as I write this letter, God gives me the wisdom to write and give praise to him. Jesus Christ is the center of my life. His everlasting arms hold me up every day. Christ is Lord of all and following Him will set us free. The love and care I was searching for has finally come in the most unexpectant place. Now I press on in Jesus' might, to glorify Him all the days of my life.

By the way, I mentioned I was going to tell you where I came from and where I'm going. As you can see from reading this I came from hell's pit. Now I'm going to Heaven to be with my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.